Weary.

That is probably the best word to describe me right now.
Weary, and just mentally exhausted.
I need a break from everything.
Away from work.
Away from church.
To just clear my mind.
To get some stuff straighten out in my life.
To basically refocus.

I know, I just took a week off work a couple weeks ago.
But in that time, I was throwing myself more into ministry.
Which, in a lot of cases, is really more difficult than help desk.

What I’m really coming to realize more and more.
Especially as I look back on how active I was in high school.
Is that I haven’t slowed that pace at all.
And I’m not 17 anymore.

I can’t keep this up for much longer.

I’m already starting to see it taking place at my secular job.
Dissatisfaction with my job.
Professionalism starting to wane.
Apathy just taking over.
Frustrations overflowing.
Leaving everyday feeling like I’ve been hit by a truck.

There has got to be more to life than this.

But church these days is a virtual mixed bag.
Some days are better than others, no doubt.
But even after a long day at work.
Again feeling like I’d been hit by a truck.
I go to church and teach those kids.
And worship. And interact. And laugh.
And I get excited about what I’ve been called to do there all over again.

This is my reassurace that I’m doing the right thing.
My only regret is that I haven’t any more time to give.

This is why my body is tired.
And my soul is weary.
And why I need to get away for a weekend.
Maybe get a small cabin in the mountains.
No television. No internet. No cell phone.
Just me and the Creator.

After all, didn’t Jesus himself break away from the crowds on occasion?
To spend time alone in prayer?
To regroup after spending days in the streets with the masses?
Clearing temples and cleansing souls?

Even Jesus couldn’t go full speed 100% of the time.
Even Jesus had to take time to just spend with the Father.

And if He, the human manifestation of the Lord God Almighty, needed to rest.
How much more do we need it?

Peace love and rest for the weary.

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5 thoughts on “Weary.

  1. amen to that kyle! i KNOW exactly how you feel!! i’ll be praying that God gives you that rest. i know you need it and i know He will be faithful to refresh you. 🙂

  2. I totally agree and understand what you’re saying. I even have a suggestion of a “refuge” if you’re interested. It’s far enough out that you won’t run into anyone but close enough you can be home in an hour or so. You’ve heard us speak of it many times I’m sure and there’s a picture of it hanging over the couch you sleep on at our house. Falls Mill. They have a log cabin bed & breakfast with no cell service and an unpublished phone number. I just don’t think you can find a closer place to God on this earth. http://www.fallsmill.com

    Love ya!!

  3. “Something More” by Ginny Owens touches on this subject. After reading this I get a sense of relief–the same since of relief I get after listening to that song. I’m so glad there is something more to this life. Sometimes we do have to get away, pray, rest, refill, and remind ourselves with even more of God’s love so we can continue to share the “something more”. I think you know what the “something more” is. It’s that something that allows us to have peace even when we are FEELING weary.

  4. i can’t keep this up for much longer

    I am saying those exact words. Mine is from stress and age but I know I have to find ‘something’, I can’t keep up much longer!! That which does NOT kill me makes me stronger, but I only feel weaker from the events/stresses that life has challenged me with lately.

    Your blogs inspire me and give me hope.
    THANKS for sharing

  5. i really like this blog cause it makes since to teens and it is about the Lord that is how i feel sometimes to man so at least u aint the only one.

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